


It's Not What You Think

by fictrash



Category: Yuri!!! on Ice (Anime)
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Drugs, F/F, F/M, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, M/M, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, POV Alternating, Pining, References to Drugs
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-06-12
Updated: 2018-06-12
Packaged: 2019-05-21 10:57:41
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,916
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14914082
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fictrash/pseuds/fictrash
Summary: Mila could understand and sympathize with Yuri's position, his unresolved anger and helplessness to change what happened. What she couldn't understand was why he had picked Altin as the scapegoat for all of it, why so angry with someone you don't even know?In other, more important news, Sara is beautiful and funny and smart and totally not in love with Mila, and as hard as she is trying to fight it off she's starting to get the feeling that all of this one sided unrequited love is making her physically sick. Actually she knows it. So maybe it's finally time to do something about that.Or: another college au that surprise! ended up mostly in Mila's POV. Also drugs. Also intense ridiculous pining bc what's a good story without angst and distress.





	It's Not What You Think

"But didn't you want to come to the party, like, yesterday?" Mila was busily tying obnoxious gold ribbons in her hair and curling them with a pair of scissors to match her fire red ringlets.  
"That was _before_ you said Altin was going to be there. And it's at your stupid friend's house. I can't just _waltz in_ all nonchalant like that doesn't make a difference."  
Mila stifiled a giggle and saw Yuri lose his composure for just a moment, his knuckles whitening against the black and gold striped bedspread. He didn't even know these people, what did he actually know about Otabek Altin except what he was satudying and his brooding, broad physique. Despite his deep-seated hatred for all Engineering students, she knew his very recent and particular obsession with Altin was more than just his usual lothsome attitude. And even if it wasn't, she could still have some fun with it. After reflecting for a moment, Mila decided was feeling reckless today. Actually, she was always feeling reckless.  
" _Honestly_ Yuri if you _like_ him so much you should just _tell_ him already."  
She braced herself against the desk by the wall for the impact as a stuffed plushie cat sailed across the room and landed square between her shoulder blades, bouncing harmelssly to the floor.  
"He's disgusting, Mila. All of those stupid nerds are disgusting and you know it too."  
He was standing now and gestured emphatically in the air, having moved out of the reflection of the mirror and into her peripheral vision.  
"Eng Student Found Distributing Pharmaceuticals out of Uni Dorm Room." He let out an exasperated sigh and let his arms fall back down, following them to retrieve the squishy plushie from the floor.  
Mila finished the last gold ribbon and turned to look at Yuri, who was daring her to say something that wasn't agreeing with him.  
Like she hadn't heard this a million times before. She did have to agree, that was a terrible thing. It was also more than two years ago, when Yuri wasn't even a student here, and the campus was fairly large, not all Engineering students knew each other. Or knew about That. Most of them had graduated by now even, or been expelled with a stain on their transcript that would likely never be overlooked. Quite an academic death sentence, really.  
There was talk of the deals resurfacing lately (not that Mila would ever mention that), only coming out in the early hours of saturday mornings over kitchen tables strewn with beer bottles and cigarette butts. A shapless organization of students looking to make a profit, looking to keep ahead of their peers, be the best and still have time for a good time. She was wary of the trouble, but also knew it was a total mistake that it hurt people last time, perhaps people would be conscientious of what exactly was being given to them this time.  
She supposed it was smart for him to be vigilant. It had reached Yuri on a personal level, forcing him to hold a grudge that may have disipated by now if... but Yuri still took it too far, lending the grudge to every individual who fell under the umbrella, most of them confused by his conspicuous glaring and spitting insults. His specific fixation on Otabek Altin, who had no known connection to the incident or the student involved was enough for Mila to tease him about it.  
"Whatever you want Yuri, but in case you change your mind, I'm at 115 Brookfield. And I'll text you when I get home, I know how you worry."  
"Like anyone wants to take you home, hag."  
Mila punched him a little too hard on the arm and bent to retrieve her bag.  
"At least I don't sulk about it. Alone." She stuck out her tongue teasing as she pushed the handle of the door.  
Yuri, attempting to get the last word, said a little too loudly into the ecohing hallway "yeah well, have a good time with your drug dealers then."  
Mila cringed, but he didn't seem to notice. He never really noticed how the things he said impacted others, he was always just saying things and assuming the world would bend and twist around them. That it would always work out in his favour. And maybe there was something to his behaviour, because it always seemed to do just that.  
Giving him the winning remark-- because he was the one truly losing out on the evening, after all-- Mila shook her head and stepped out into the hallway, letting the door close behind her with an eerie click and rejoin the uniformity of the other green doors lining the walls.  
God she hated residence.  
Pushing her knit scarf closer to her face, she made her way to the main entrance, across campus and to the bus stop.

~

 _Stupid Hag_ Yuri thought as the door clicked shut behind Mila. The truth was, she was his best friend. Like he would ever say so, but hey even admitting it to himself had been a big step. And maybe she was right about his sulking and silliness. Maybe he would go next time. Maybe he should stop hating every stupid Enj student and all of Mila's friends and get over it. It's not like it was really their fault. And besides, if Mila liked them then they couldn't be that unbearable. But last time, when he decided to go -- ugh he absolutely hated that man, hated him and all his friends and his stupid sunglasses. Who the fuck wears sunglasses _indoors_ in the _night time_?  
Thoroughly annoyed, Yuri flopped onto his bed and pulled his computer towards him, mindlessly drifting towards Netflix and pushing all his assignments aside in his mind, swallowing them up and trying not to feel guilty about it.  
Against his will, his encounter with Altin came back into his mind, floating to the surface with no substance. Yuri groaned and pulled the nearest pillow over his head, his own voice echoing around his headphones.  
_What are you looking at, asshole?_  
Absolutely disgusting.

~

The house was bursting and raucous, the front door open to the chilly November air, people spilling out of it onto the lawn. A pair of idiots was rolling down the steps and onto the frosty grass. _It's not even eleven and people are already fighting_.  
Mila shook her head and gave the growing crowd a wide berth, grateful when the music got close enough to drown out the insufferable chanting and skin slapping behind her. She sent a quick text to Sara, who was presumably somewhere in the chaos, and pushed through some bodies to find the kitchen.  
She wasn't sure why she attended these parties, they were getting bigger and further out of hand every week, more and more students trading books for beers and attempting to shave some years off their livers in one night. Mila stopped drinking a year ago, claiming she'd lost the taste for it. Really it was a complicated mixture of things that had more to do with being in control and a distaste for drunk men with wandering hands, but there was no need to get into it.  
"Oi, Mila! Over here!" She turned towards the voice she knew so well and instantly her mood lifted, catching a far away glimpse of dark hair and violet eyes.  
Ah yes, this is why she came to these parties.  
Abandoning her mission to the kitchen, she bullied her way through circles of conversation to her favourite thing about attending university. Sara Crispino, and better: Sara Crispino in Mila's favourite dress. Mila's heart skipped a beat when Sara's hand went up in the air, the light catching the ring on her finger, a token of their friendship that she had quietly put on and never taken off. As if Mila wouldn't notice. As if she didn't notice everything about her.  
As quickly as her mood had improved, it sunk even faster as she got closer and the parting bodies revealed the arm around Sara's shoulder. She knew who it was attached to and she didn't want to look.  
As if sensing her discomfort Sara gently pushed the arm away and took a step toward her, catching her in a fierce embrace, as if she hadn't seen her in months instead of hours. She pulled away all too quickly, but touched the ribbons in Mila's hair and smiled beautifully. It was enough to pull Mila out of the gloom and turn towards the god forsaken Boyfriend.  
Emil was not a bad guy. He was tall, had honey brown hair, and said all the right things. He was a voice of reason, still wild but never too out of hand. A pretty talented musician, who listened to fresh local bands, and was so infuriatingly good to Sara that Mila couldn't find a decent reason for why she _hated_ every single fiber of his being. Well, she could, but she would never say it or think it, not even to herself, and certainly not to Sara.  
"Hey Mila what's cracking?" Emil shot her a goofy grin and she felt Sara settle in between them, the swish of her hair silently sweeping across Mila's arm was enough to relax her posture a little. She tried not to visibly wince when he threw his arm back over Sara's shoulders, or the way she softened underneath it.  
_God she had it bad._  
"Full house tonight eh? Hope no one is getting too comfortable in your room again." She shot Emil her best toothy grin and he rolled his eyes at her.  
"Don't even joke, I'm going to have to replace the lock on my door _again_ this semester. It's an arm and a leg to get a locksmith, and I think they all know me by name now. I'm going to have to move and shave my head! If I could just catch the damn lock-picker I'd make them pay me all the money I've spent on them."  
"Ah but your lucky they haven't stolen anything, maybe they just like to see you flustered."  
"A secret admirer, Emil?" Phichit popped up between Emil and Mila, clapping Emil on the back with a hearty slap. "Tell me, boy, what is the trick? How do I get them drooling over me heh?" He looked over at Sara and Mila and winked. Sara looked mock offended while Emil jokingly covered her ears and hissed, "not in front of my girlfriend you ass!"  
Everyone dissolved into easy laughter and Mila let herself sink into the hum of the party, the way the conversation and bass mixed and vibrated through the floorboards was soothing.  
Sara tapped her cup gently and announced "I'm going to get another drink, anyone want anything from the kitchen?" A murmur and shaking of heads, Sara turned to Mila and grabbed her hand, pulling her suddenly into the crowd. Sara was so much better at weaving through the people than she was, and it was almost as if there were no people at all save the violet dress and tanned had that led her away.  
The house had four roomates. Emil and Phichit, who had been there the last three years, Leo who moved in last year and a new guy named Guang Hong. Mila hadn't met him yet but from what she'd gathered he was quiet and "nice enough". She didn't see Leo very often either, she wasn't sure where he went all the time but he was hardly ever home. All of them were engineering students. Even Sara, who, when you met her, you wouldn't expect to be pursuing a chemical engineering degree. But people will surprise you.  
Mila was studying psychology, the kind that makes you a counsellor with the pen and the reclined sofa, and she was not sure how she ended up here, with all of these people. Well, really Sara had drawn her in, all flashing colours and wild brightness, but when she stopped being "Sara's friend Mila" and became just "Mila" she wasn't sure. Mostly, since the campus was so big, faculties kept to themselves, and people didn't have to venture far to find others with similar interests. That was probably the point of all those psychology mixers that Mila had stopped attending. In Mila's three years she had never clicked with anyone in her own program. They always seemed so vague, shapeless, and she was beginning to wonder if she had picked the wrong thing, if maybe this wasn't what she was meant to do after all. That first year was hardly bearable, but after meeting Sara, and then a year later Yuri, she felt a lot more comfortable.  
Yuri was two years behind Mila, also studying Psychology but not the 'put you in a chair and ask you how you feel' kind, he was studying the brain kind. Mila did understand a bit of it, but she didn't care for all the biological talk and the extremely term heavy chemistry courses that it came with so when she was registering she decided not to bother. Still, some of their course material overlapped and he could talk about it in a way that made her finally feel interested in the things she had been learning. He only enrolled in September and already it felt like she'd known him a lifetime.  
She did sorta know him from before, because she had been friends with Vic in her first year, family friends, childhood friends. Vic talked about him all the time too, about his short temper and fierce personality. She wasn't sure if Yuri knew that or not, though, and she wasn't about to bring it up casually, lest he ban her from his life too.  
Sitting on the back step was starting to get a bit chilly, and she had lent her coat to Sara who was merrily smoking a cheap cigarette beside her. Mila supressed her shiver and took another sip of her gingerale. The cold could be endured in exchange for the quiet, voices from inside mostly muffled, and only a handful of conversation in low voices on the broad wooden deck.  
"You know what's great about Mickey being out of town?" Sara tapped the ashes off the burning orange tip in a casual, unhurried manner. Mila hummed slowly and resisted the urge to grab Sara's free hand that was dangling between them, moving instead to prop her chin up by her hand on her knee.  
"I don't have to worry about him wondering where I am every twenty minutes. I haven't checked my phone in two hours Mila! And it's so calm. Everyone is just so tense when he's around. Emil won't even touch me most of the time! It's getting ridiculous, I mean it's been almost a year now you'd think he'd calm down a little." Mila wasn't sure if she was talking about Emil or her brother in that last part. She probably meant both. "And he hardly trusts me at all! Of all my friends, he only trusts you. That means you must be super special." Sara looked at her and winked mischeviously, and their faces were so close together Mila was going to burn a hole in the wood underneath her. No, Mickey definitely should not trust her.  
With a last drag Sara finished off her cigarette and stood up to squish it into the ashtray, Mila's big warm coat slipping slightly off her shoulders and exposing bare skin to the crisp breeze. She drew the coat closer to her and held a hand out to Mila, ready to pull her back up and into the warm house.

~

_I'm home loser_  
_I hope your night was terrible and boring_

Mila sighed and threw her keys and phone onto her bed before unceremoniously flubbing onto her back and staring at the ceiling. Sara had decorated it with sparkly purple foam stars. She had been a bit to short to reach and had to jump on the bed to slap them onto the ceiling. She actually managed to get four or five before she broke the cheap bed frame, and now Mila's matress rested on the floor.  
Lost in the memory, she jumped a little when her phone vibrated close to her leg.

_My night got 100 times better after you left bc u r so annoying and u take up so much spaceeee_  
_Also you left your ribbon here_  
_If you don't come pick it up by tomorrow I'm throwing it out_

Mila sighed, and left the message read and ignored, hoping to get a rise out of him but too tired to actually try. She doubted he would throw out her ribbon, and if he did she just wouldn't bring him coffee on her way to class for the next couple of days. Straighten him out.  
_What's today? Saturday. Oh there is so much to do. What time is it anyway?_ Mila glanced at the clock on her nightstand, it read 1:06. _Not too bad, I can get a good sleep and then tomorrow morning I'll run down and make a coffee and-_  
Her thoughts were interrupted by another text. Assuming it was from Yuri, Mila picked it up slowly and turned on the screen again. But it was from Sara.

_Glad you came tonight xx coffee date in the morning? Just us_

Oh wow. Ah the to-do list could wait.


End file.
